125 COLOUR CODING IDENTITY CRISIS...

In the previous post, I discussed the different sign colours across Europe. The takeaway is that countries flip-flop between blue and green, which can be challenging but not as challenging as navigating the signs in Belgium.

First, the E-routes (motorways) are marked in blue - pretty standard European stuff, right? Then Belgium adds the A-roads, which aren't what we know as A-roads. They are a different type of motorway, so they are also blue - despite being different!

Next up, we have the N-roads (national roads, not to be confused with the national highway, which is, of course, called the A-roads), sporting white signs with red letters because apparently, someone in the Belgian transport ministry woke up one day and thought, "You know what would be fun? Making our road signs look like a barber pole."

Then there are the R-roads (ring roads), which, in true Belgian fashion, can't decide what colour they want to be. Sometimes they're orange, sometimes white with orange bits, and sometimes they go rogue and pick whatever colour felt right that day.

Thankfully, we aren't driving in Brussels; that is where the real fun starts. The signs seem to have been designed by a committee that couldn't agree.

We will follow an orange sign that suddenly turns blue, then white, then back to orange - all while going in what you hope is a circle but might be a very elaborate spiral into madness.

And let's not forget the unique joy of bilingual signs. Why do you have one confusing direction when you can have it in both French and Dutch...in Belgium? It's like getting lost in stereo. We're not just missing our exit in one language; we're missing it in two! Sometimes three, if we're lucky enough to be near the German border.

Then, there is the infamous 'priority from the right' rule. It isn't about sign colours but deserves an honourable mention because it turns every unmarked junction into a game of chicken with surprisingly polite stakes. The signs for these intersections are typically black and white, presumably because they ran out of colours in the Belgian sign budget.

<Jeremy Clarkson Voice On>

Some say the Belgian highway sign system was designed after a particularly wild night involving several Trappist beers and a colour wheel. Others suggest it's a sophisticated psychological experiment to test human adaptability. All we know is that it somehow works in a uniquely Belgian way.

<Jeremy Clarkson Voice Off>

So, when driving in Belgium, remember that blue means important unless it means slightly less important, white with red means national unless it's part of a ring road having an identity crisis, and orange means you're probably going in a circle unless you're not - simple!